Rings around the moon.

Post Psychosis  Diary. I'm beginning to see the aftermath. Running has protected me so far, but I can only run so far. My running was the good sort, the best sort. A run through years of training, of making connections. Getting me to where I am now. The knock at the door yesterday, the daughter of the lady who used to bring me tomatoes from her garden. As her daughter handed me the tomatoes that she grew, as her mother had grown. Handing me the bag and giving me a hug. And I suppose it all just stopped.  People see, people want to be kind because we all know how difficult things can be... I don't know what to do. This is the long and short of it.  I suspect a genetic link regarding my son's psychosis. But I'm not strong enough to face my son's father - ok, I need to ask myself what do I need to make a meeting possible...so I can cope? But.. Do I need to know the shape, dimensions of what caused a similar breakdown in my husband's sister? If I side with the old a...

Another mom I know went through something similar.  Except she welcomed the moment her child got a diagnosis because the school counsellor - not qualified, not BACP registered - went with everything she was told by the child, and blamed the mother. Social services were involved, and despite the teenage child attacking their parents bedroom door with the hammer, and despite this child just running out of the house into the night. Repeatedly. Despite their psychotic delusions, the child was given accommodation away from the family. When the child was found trying to sever their own hands... Things changed and the child was sectioned! So this mom was relieved, so relieved , feeling that finally she was being taken seriously -and that her child was a lot safer for the duration. Years later her child like my son both are stuck in a loop of constant takeaways and dreams that crumble and burn. Except my son can't afford takeaways because he won't claim benefits - because he can't ...